one for the road ... Mikey

"Beat It" - Written and composed by Michael Jackson.

They told him don't you ever come around here

Don't wanna see your face, you better disappear

The fire's in their eyes and their words are really clear

So beat it, just beat it

You better run, you better do what you can

Don't wanna see no blood, don't be a macho man

You wanna be tough, better do what you can

So beat it, but you wanna be bad

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it

Just beat it, beat it

Just beat it, beat it

Just beat it, beat it

They're out to get you, better leave while you can

Don't wanna be a boy, you wanna be a man

You wanna stay alive, better do what you can

So beat it, just beat it

You have to show them that you're really not scared

You're playin' with our life, this ain't no truth or dare

They'll kick you, then they beat you,

Then they'll tell you it's fair

So beat it, but you wanna be bad

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it

Beat it, beat it, beat it

Beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or who's right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or right

Just beat it, beat it

Beat it, beat it, beat it

Beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or who's right

Beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or who's right

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it

No one wants to be defeated

Showin' how funky and strong is your fight

It doesn't matter who's wrong or rightJust beat it, beat it

Beat it, beat it, beat it

death of a tragedy ...

michael jackson died on 26 Jun 09. Billy Jean, Thriller, Beat It, Ebony and Ivory, This Girl is Mine ... michael's songs were definitive in my rocker-ing indulgences since I was 10? or was it 9. Billy Jean was a favorite hit amongst my soccer buddies, i could still remember Michael's mv for Ebony with Paul McCartney. however, on 26 Jun 09, Michael Jackson passed on ... as a tragedy. Enough is said of what happened, but as a former fan, I would have preferred that he died with more glory, as a symbol of his era, like Kurt Cobain, who died in his prime. But it was not to be. in recent memory, all we could remember about Michael Jackson was his broken nose, his multi-multi million dollar debt, his child abuse allegations and not for the revolution he brought to rock music in the 1980's ... his moon-walk ... and yes, Jackson Five. in any case, let us remember what Michael Jackson did for rock music, the glorious era and his struggles. Oh well, like many of us, he had his dreams, he had his disillusions, heartbreaks and as the story goes, to become somebody he was not. But he tried to pursue his dreams, and he fell, just like many of us ... like many of us, he f**ked it up. Let us remember Michael Jackson for the memories he left us ... in his music.

being alone ...

did not text Sunshine much since Thursday, but was glad she called, and there were usual goodnight muacks, and a few friendly exchanges since then. well, I fear meeting her since thursday as I was not sure how to express myself. I guess I need some time to figure out who I am to her. was her 'outburst' on thursday due to just frustration, or cos she did not regard me as someone special, nothing compared to her friends and close office-mates or not sure, why. Perhaps I was afraid of such rejections, and was afraid to go through these kind of courtship all over again. Perhaps I was just doing baseless comparisons. In any case, I've lost confidence. I just feel like a low-life germ after that dinner. I just wanted some time to figure things out and reconcile with reality. I do miss her but this was mingled with a little fear of her ... so for the time being, I'll just be alone.

a friend in need

so bushed after helping a good friend, a close buddy with a piece of work. Was quite pissed initially as he was away on a diving holiday and did not do much ... and it was HIS work. Spent a good part of the day doing it for him and the evening piecing it together. But at the end of the day, I was glad I kept my anger to myself and helped him the best I could. Think it's a Ace job. well, we have been buddies for more than 13 years, and we had been through all the shit together. I reckoned that he was indeed handicapped in some aspects and really counted on me to help him. so I was glad I did my part for him ... he's after all, my buddy.

dinner with a germ

after dinner with Sunshine today, I just felt like some low life germ. sigh. its f**king friday again.

my dream

i want to own a cafe by the beach ... in a quiet corner of the world ... i want to look at the stars every night ... with a cigarette in hand ... listen to the waves and soft jazz music playing in my cafe ... where i'll play my favorite songs with my guitar ... and go to bed every night ... indifferent to how each day was like ... to be alone, and at times, enjoy the company of strangers who would pop by my beach cafe for a bowl of nice hot soup, or a ice cold beer ... listen to the stories of back-packers from other corners of the world ... they can have a free meal if they leave their stories behind ... to live each day without happiness or disappointment, not concerned whether I love or being loved, just me, my cafe, my cigarettes, my guitar, the beach and the stars .... 

好累

by the way ...

such a long day, and a long day ahead, shadow looked forward to meeting sunshine but sunshine has decided not to meet. its nice to be the repertoire and not an interlude, it nice to be the way and not by the way, its nice to be the focus and not the forgone. why? once again shadow ask. well, what is shadow to be expecting anything anyway. life would be happier without an inflated sense of self-importance. you're not button nose ... its time to go to sleep. goodnight, day #20 - melancholixia.

a sad song

happiness has no meaning if there's no sadness, 

joy has no meaning if there are no sorrows,

life has no meaning if there's no death, 

laughter has no meaning if there are no tears,

warm has no meaning if there's no winter,

so love as no meaning if there's no sadness, sorrows, tears and winter,

so how about death you may ask,

so love is dead when there's only sadness, sorrows, tears and winter. 

headache

damn, my monday headache is no monday headache. Its Wed and it still hurts. its so bad I din watch 24 for two nights, never ready anything and did even text Sunshine much. 

mondays are bad for health ....

i cant feel the right side of my head!!! damn monday headaches!!! monday brain freeze !!! over-stretched jaws!!! damn, mondays are bad for health !!!  

the importance of f**king up ....

I must admit my F1 fever is going to be short-lived now that the big boys are leaving the championship next year, and Mclaren's showing this season was wrecked by a #$@% car. One of the joys of last season was about watching Lewis Hamilton climb his way to world championship, so the dismal performance of the team was quite depressing, especially when Lewis ended up in 16th place in home ground yesterday. Well, I supposed losing and being at the bottom (especially after being crowned champion) is part and parcel of life ... I remembered managing a sports team years back ... bottom of the table ... and for two years, it was nothing but training and training three times a week, having friendlies with big boys to get thrashed, time to lick their wounds after that and training harder ... and two years later, they became champions. Failures ... It helps you get a clearer resolution on what you want, the humiliation would be the driving force of the future, the sorrows would build character, the defeats would build strength, all that you would need to make a better champion. Besides, Lewis is young, he has time ... way to go !!!

Sunshine's Home

the weekend ended with a high note with Sunshine coming home ...